Apologies

So I know I have been absent this week. It kind of tore me apart.

I hope I will be back Monday.

Until then....pray I don't die. ;)

Guest Post by Nobody

Yeah, so, I totally didn't plan for this week at all and had no one on the list to write this guest post. I'm such a splendid organizer...

So, here I am, scrambling out some sort of post by which I can make amends. Nobody is{n't} perfect. {Pun intended...eh he...and I'm bad at making puns.} But at least this is something.

I have been reading a storm of books this last month. I've probably finished ten or eleven novels. Several of them were excellent. Several were mediocre. One of the ones I picked up was Peter Pan by J. M. Barrie. Not the children's Disney makeover, but the real classic Peter Pan. It is fantastic.

It is still a children's story {obviously}, but it is so cute. I love the narrating style and laughable moments. Of course, I am still a child at heart, so what can I say?

I have been editing my own novel In the Shadow to within and inch of my life. Someday I'll get it there....someday....

I had this ridiculous notion when I began this blog for it to be some sort of professional site with Q & A format, exact purposes, specific guidelines and picture-perfect posts. So I've given up that dream {or nightmare} because I realized that is not what I want. I want my writing to be more than that. Up front and personal. Meaningful. Useful. Not a dry, thick-worded mass through which you have to wade just to discover something interesting. {How was that for absolutely boring...}

I don't do boring. It's not my thing. Never been bored an hour in my life. I don't plan on making you bored either.

Oh, and a reminder to you all. The giveaway ends in a few days. Here are the rules and the prize!!

Rules to enter:

1: must be a member of Stories in the Mind
2: loves to read!!! :)
3: comment on the blog in one post other than this one
4: tell me what your favorite book is and why! {if you have done this, feel free to skip it and I will add you in for the 4th tag anyway, just let me know you have completed it}
5: give me one reason why I should pick you. JK!! share the giveaway on your blog and send me the link

The giveaway is open internationally.

 

 



And yes, I realize this was supposed to be up....yesterday. My Internet shut off before I could post it. Technical difficulties. Don't we all love them.

I will try to get the Once Upon a Time... linkup up today. I am having troubles getting this all done. If I don't, it WILL go up tomorrow. The prompt will be: a faceoff.



Thursday Funnies

 

Writing Mistakes – Bad Vocabulary

• Amateur: A very good person in sports
• Cadet: A boy who carries golf clubs
• Cynical: A cynical lump of sugar is one pointed at the top
• Dead heat: Anything in such a raging heat that it would kill you
• Ignition: The art of not noticing
• Income: A yearly tax
• Individual: One piece of people
• Inter alia: Something in the ale
• Lie: An aversion to the truth
• Preposterous: a child born after his father’s death
• Quorum: Another word for quandary. It happens at meetings.
• Spectre: A man who cheers a football team
• Transparent: Something you can see through — for instance, a keyhole
• Snow: Rain, all popped out white
• Stars: The moon’s eggs

 

Writing Mistakes – Typos!

Random:

• Last night, when I ate dinner, I started joking.
  My friend hit my back very hard until I stopped.
  I was so lucky he was there!

Parents:

• I always ate lunch at school.
  But every day my mother made me suffer.

• My bed has three blankets
  and a large guilt my parents gave me.

• My father met us at the airport
  and gave me a big hog.
  Then he hogged my wife



Weddings:

• I have something exciting to tell you. My girlfriend and I got enraged last night!

• The groom was wearing a very nice croissant

• He lifted the veal off her face and gave her a big kiss.

Sports:

• When we won, I was so exciting I had goose pimps all over my body.

• Did I tell you I climbed half way up one of the tallest pigs in the world?

• It was so exciting to watch! The cheerleaders threw up high into the air.

A Recipe:

• -First, heat up your pants really hot, then add oil.
  -Put the cabbages in salt water. Then sit in the sink until the morning.
  -Next, chop all the vegetarians into little pieces.
  -Next, add a little Buddha and mix it all up.
  -When you are finished cooking, find a suitable bowel and eat it with chopsticks.

 





Random funny quotes:

For a long time now I have tried simply to write the best I can. Sometimes I have good luck and write better than I can.

I love being a writer. What I can’t stand is the paperwork.

A good head and good heart are always a formidable combination. But when you add to that a literate tongue or pen, then you have something very special.
{In all honesty....I like this one... :D}

The waste basket is the writer’s best friend.



The difference between an author and a horse is that the horse doesn’t understand the horse dealer’s language.

If writers were good businessmen, they’d have too much sense to be writers.

It’s a poor mind that can only think of one way to spell a word.

I just wrote a book, but don’t go out and buy it yet, because I don’t think it’s finished yet.

The difference between the right word and almost the right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.

Only a mediocre writer is always at his best.

Television has raised writing to a new low.

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.

Copy from one, it’s plagiarism; copy from two, it’s research.



 

 

 

 

 

 

{Some found HERE}

 

 

 

In which I....die of embrassment

So, um, yeah, please laugh. Because I can't believe I am doing this.

I found some random docs on my computer of schoolwork I did back in 2007, when I was in 9th grade. I was doing a program called the Omnibus for History and Writing. Which of course made it super fun....but let's not hold our breath over my 13-year-old writing, eh? Just for fun, I am posting up a story I wrote, unedited, raw, exactly the way it was on that doc when I pulled it up.

I'm pretty sure this assignment had a point to it, besides being set in William the Conquerer's Norman England {I'm related to him, by the way, directly through royalty, with proven docs. Just a random, cool sidenote there... :D}. Something about knowing what's really important or something like that. Else I can't justify that ending....

Anyway....laugh. Please.



The Norman Way

By

 Pure Grace

 

Ó Pure Grace

The sun was shinning brightly over the glistening indigo sea. The sharp morning breeze carried the exultant call of birds, greeting each other anew for the day, along with the distinctly salty flavor of the ocean. From his high perch among the rocks, Edmund could clearly see the approaching vessels. This time, the fair Saxon knew, they were not coming to simply speak with King Harold. They were coming to conquer. Simply enough, the boy thought, they are coming to kill us–and our families!

He turned and briskly began to scramble down the cliff. Sprinting along the trail, Edmond felt a quaver of hatred, taken over by one of fear, not for himself, but for his sisters and mother. What right had those Normans to take England into their domain? In a moment the lad was joined by another.

“You saw them?” he panted, without slowing his pace.

“Aye,” the other responded. “We will tell the others.”

In a few minutes they reached a small camp. The man obviously in charge immediately called them to him. After reporting the boys helped clear the camp and begin to fall back. The main English army was ready when William the Conqueror disembarked. The invaders were to be repulsed to the last defense. Expectantly, Edmund stood by his father on the battle field with a heaving chest. If the Normans won, Saxon Britain was dead.

After much waiting the enemy troops appeared. The conflict that ensued became known as the Battle of Hastings. Edmund fought to defend his country, his people, his family valiantly, but still one by one the Saxons fell. At the close of the batter few men were alive. Edmund, captured, lay desperate with fear. The Normans had won! It was of little comfort when the noble lad was set free. Few would retain their position unless they conformed. That would be imposable for him. Yet one glance at the faces of his dear ones at home changed that opinion, and as others before him, he reluctantly reformed to the Norman way of life. A family was better than any tradition.



 

 

Don't forget about the giveaway found HERE for this item!!

 

 

 

 

Also, this week's Once Upon a Time... linkup will be on: an interview.